Tuesday, February 5, 2008 11:16 PM
Well it does so happen that I was in Miami for new Years. Fun and more fun.
And now I am done with flying. Starting new jobs having loads more free time and embarking on new trips of friendships and more.
Will be in New Zeland in a few weeks then Sydney. Yes a parade is involved. Yes I am in costume. There will be blood.
its a good time.
Thursday, January 31, 2008 4:05 PM
yin
yang
Well it has def. been a whirlwind on this end emotionally,socially and workwise so lets get to it.
Help put together a fun get together at my friends house then Muscle Drag then Out for Bekkas BDAY.
had a brush with gay drama....thankfully brief and my one time a year inoculation.
and the world turns
A very good friend who was more than a friend before and then we were in a gray zone have cleared the mist and I am hopeful things move on in a good way.
and the world turns.
Went to one of the best fund raisers in years. The Williams Project. This is a group I really really respect. They are going about gay rights the smart way through the courts. having had to sue my own medical school (Cornell Med) for same sex housing rights I feel very strongly about this. It was a friendly smart fun crowd. Really had a great time and had the best five minute convo that is turning into a longer and longer convo.
and the world turns
Dressed up for Drag Strip 66. It was a great time. Max Carlos and I went as Chile Con and Carne. It was a Quincinera theme.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008 3:05 AM
Sitting here after a twelve hour shift in the ER. Its 7 am and I have the bleary semi alert semi hyped very caffeine sense of being. It was a good night. I say that in the sense that I am working in a very busy ER that serves the undeserved (poor) of Las Vegas. I am VERY happy that I have taken a step and worked in a new environment. Its hard. The people here are vastly different than the hispanic population I am used to. My plan of attack has to change and adapt to a new language and population.
When you think about it I have five to fifteen minutes to walk into a room full of concerned strangers and bond enough with them to convince them that "hey its a great idea to cut my kid open and get that appendix out" or some such. I get there by a little laughter a lot of good ol boy talk and a lot lot lot of listening. Its really what they want the most and 9 times out of ten if you listen closely to the parents they describe enough to walk you to the diagnosis.
A wise woman out here said "there are a lot of lost souls in Vegas and they have kids". Its so so so true. The family unit here is two if the kids are lucky and if they are really lucky there are not a pack OF luckys next to them on the gurney as I treat them for asthma.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008 2:59 PM
New Year....hmmmm.
Miami was fun. Hanging with my sister and a good friend (below) that I met over four years ago on a random transport to Rio. I had a lay over he was out with friends and we have kept in touch as which I think a great serendipity. And he is hands down the sweetest man in the world. Came back to a great rainy LA.
Turned in my helicopter wings today. Going onto other adventures. I will miss the flying it was and will always be a special time but truth be told its hard and its very dangerous. 10 yrs is enough. I still have the outfit though.
I left last year over-dating. Too dilute and truth be told I STILL may not be ready. When does that threshold get crossed? ! Its annoying. Like any sharp edge I am waiting for time to hone it for me a bit.
Sydney Mardi's Gras. I have been graciously (if injudiciously) invited in the parade on a float or some such. Can you believe? Hello Gym.
Sunday, January 6, 2008 8:52 PM
scenes.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007 4:04 PM
ok so its been bzy. The year is ending with a slew of some really nice fun people I have met that I am looking forward to seeing more of in the new year as hopefully good friends. New plans and new places so its all a good thing. My house is a hostel this new years while I am away. People from Hawaii, Vegas, NewPort beach, SF all crashing. I love that.
I also love my friend SO MUCH. Two friends are having a big party but then also were having a small dinner. Well I mixed up the events and showed up to the small dinner with two other friends in tow for the party. Yeah. nice. BUT they just smiled said hello and we all sat down for a nice fun dinner. Its all about inclusion. and keeping my schedule straight.
Getting killed by a tiger is one of the ways no one outside of India would ever think of going. And I am so glad that CNN.com has found a kid they can exploit for coverage. What they did facilitating his plastic surgery is admirable bit its no mitzvah.
I have been working nonstop. Off to vegas then Miami for a good long vacation with friends and family. Have a great new year!
Friday, December 21, 2007 11:26 AM
yes
this is Vegas
Did you know that Las Vegas has been voted one of the best outdoor cities in the US. And this is by oh lets see NATIONAL GEOGRPAHIC. In case you are well anywhere this site I find has the best hiking trail information. Sorry Donald it does not include the Men s Floor at Neimans.
The ER was calm last night. But here is the typical oh well.
young kid comes in does not feel well, goes to lie down and then is found unresponsive. We see him evaluate have him intubated in the CT scanner with Neurosurgery, there a PICU bed ready and we see a large bleed. Turns out his parents are on vacation, no one knows how to reach them, their religion prohibits blood transfusions he is dying on the table and needs to go to the OR.
So Dr. what should we do?
You commit him to the hell that his parents have conceived without his consent and save his life which is what we did.
and when the church members stare at you in the hall you meet their eyes dead on.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007 11:40
Loving camping out with my friend Johnn in Vegas. Its mostly work, sleep, wake up, talk about cases we saw, workout work, sleep, repeat. I bitch about boys he bitches about girls. But then there is the dinner made, sci-fi movie watched, bullshiting that's really fun.
Where is the camera? I used to never go out without a camera now its absent more often than not. That needs to change.
Rules for revisiting the past:
You can't go back and learn the lesson you should have known. All you can do is enjoy the punishment all over again.
You can go back and cross that burning bridge and say something nice that may make all the difference to someone else.
These are not mutually exclusive rules.
PS Joan Armatrading. just saying.
Friday, December 7, 2007 12:00 PM
Been spending a few days in Vegas working. Its amazing how hospitals vary. From the county where you are practically scrapping gum off the waiting room chairs to get a snack to this place where there is a full on room full of food, coffee, espresso machines etc etc open 24 hours a day for free. The medicine is the same saw some cute cute kids and some annoying parents.
Scene: Talking to LV dancer boy (they are rife) #1, LV dancer boy #2 spills #1's drink then looks to me to replace it. Which I do since we are all talking and its all good fun. Then LV dancer boy #2 wants his own drink.
Me:" Your drink is in your friends hand. You can be cute don't be assuming. "
LA may have taught me more than I know.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007 10:53 PM
Well I am moving in the new year to San Francisco. It will be a 80/20 or so with LA.s I have been grumbling and grousing about it for a long time now. The kids are in school, I am starting a job that allows me great freedom, I can keep the place in LA to come back to easily. Its time. I am not moving for professional reasons its more personal.
Its just where I think I resonate a little more than here and in some very important ways. I am not one of those (who truly annoy me in SF) who making such an onerous comparison between the two cities. To my mind its really not a wise idea to reject something (such as an entire city) so entirely out of hand.
We shall see if my gut feeling is borne out. I am excited and I think ready for it. I lived in NY at a phase in my life, Brazil then Venice and LA at another and now I feel ready (all photos on this site, witnesses for the prosecution, non withstanding) for this change.
I may feel a little stretched between cities, I may not like it, I may never come back. Possibilities abound which is really the goal I believe.
I had the worse case scenario in the ER which is the two month old in extremis and try as we could I could not get him back. He had complex disease and was completely unresponsive to everything I threw at him. I have to say the nurses and residents did a great job. The family was in shock as were we since we had no idea this child was coming into to us and then it was about an hour of pure work and effort without success. We don't hide our feelings at times like this. We all have our moments of tears or husky voices and I think the families appreciate that we do not hide behind our coats as it were.
Friday, November 30, 2007 11:30 AM
Sorry here is the link to the cruise pics. Since we all were... lets say "committed to the cause" as the week goes on we get browner and in my case def. look a little more tired but all good fun.
Its raining in LA. Fantastic. I am reading The Great Stink and Atonement (Two very ends of post Victorian England) and listening to the rain fall. Very warm under the covers and very peacefull. Work tonight in the ER the rain tends to weed out the less serious cases (ie. the common cold.
Friday, November 30, 2007 0:39 AM
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Look at her pose. ONE WORD.....PRO.
Tonight someone who knows me well said he was reading this little blog thing and since he knew me it was not a surprise. If I were to meet him de-novo out I would appear "on" and much different than here.
Its a struggle sometimes. How can you possibly convey your depth and meaning to somebody when you are "out". We are out to have a good time, to enjoy the company AND enhance the nights of others (Burner ethos). I simply refuse to be the silent,recalcitrant one as a ruse.
That's why give SO much slack for people. How can you begin to know the cut of a man on one survey.
Went to divine design after a night with my two kids, hung out with MORE KIDS (hint gay fashionistas) and then a club where I witnessed man on man "activity". What a night.
Thursday November 29, 2007 4:08 PM
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Finally some cruise pictures have made it. What I find so interesting is how people react when they hear that I went on a gay cruise. yawn. I live in LA I am used to it. When I go to SF its alwyas the same first five mins of conversation. Then I wake up again and we go on and have fun. Speaking of which I am WOEFULLY negligent of sending some good love up there so y'all I am coming into town this weekend. hide the silver.
Thursday, November 29, 2007 0:25 AM
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Well its winter in LA which means that while people are still wearing flip flops the scarfs are out. A little known fact is that the INSIDE of your house in LA is a lot colder than the outside. Have yet to figure that one out.
Ok. SO to make my secret boyfriend in Atlanta happy. Here is a list with links to make the catch up all the easier.
making coffee with face masks. It does work.
157: Number of Cleft Lips and Palates our Mission in China repaired.
4.5 : Number of days we did it in.
5: average number of hours we slept.
1: Number of gay cruises I went on in the past two months.
5: number of parties I went to on the cruise.
0: number of staterooms I woke up in that were not my own
1: number of times I woke up on my balcony.
3: number of exboyfriends I have suddenly stopped.... lets say not liking ...a lot. Really it was getting tiring and I have been pleasantly surprised.
4: number of jobs I have. Time to trim.
2: number of people in an Island state I am head over heels for.
25: number of countries I have been in to date.
Monday, November 5, 2007 11:30 AM
ok ok ok sorry literally boarding a plane to China. will be back in two weeks. whoever is still reading this. its been a whirlwind. I have started a job in Vegas, gone on a gay cruise, met some really really cute boys, revisted places in my mind and body I thought I left a long time ago and basically been doing a lot o things.
Friday, October 5, 2007 4:00 PM
I am going on a big gay cruise. just for fun. I have seen a lot of the Europe stops so I think its just for a fun time with some new people.
My facebook page. wow I threw something up and all sorts of people are around. I have always avoided these sites. I am leery but facebook at least thus far seems to avoid the puerile. My fav thing is the scrabble challenge and the cities map you can post.
three random B man pics sent to me. this was the dawn after the burn. my third dawn in a row.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007 2:23 PM
sometimes a seemingly innocuous picture can bring back so many memories it hurts.
I don't know why I am so attracted to photography but for me its like smell
or sound for others. I hang my memories off images. And there they stay, so
incredibly fresh. When I see that particular image again and it all floods back.
I was so so happy here.
LA JOLLA, Calif. -- More than 20 homes have been threatened along a La Jolla hillside Wednesday as a 50-yard-wide, cone-shaped sinkhole swallowed part of a street leading into the ritzy area.
"RITZY"..... my god Walter Winchell is alive and well living in San Diego.
This is going to be fun this weekend if you are in LA.
A good friend of mine is finishing Beowulf then going to the Watchmen......yes!!
It does not happen often but sometimes you do bring someone back from the brink or even a little over it and they are not damaged etc. I was doing CPR on a two day old for over two hours. I think I used every medication I knew and it worked! While in the ambulance careening down the freeway (bruises to prove it) I would compress her chest she opened her eyes like to say "I am still here" when I stopped to see if she had her own heart rate she would close her eyes get gray gray and start to fade....so back to CPR. She had a HUGE electrolyte problem so the goal was to support her cardiac function while we threw the kitchen sink at her to get her lytes back in whack. I am still a little high over it. These stories become the "war stories" we tell each other over and over and over again. Its incredibly bonding on the team.
Monday October 1, 2007 5:27 PM
ok its been a while...A fun weekend with some cool people. I think that I made up for not going out too much in one feel swoop.
Had the nest organic night when Mike just decided to make some tappas and his bfriend Caleb was helping then the frenchies came over then charley and josh then some more people. Not planned just comfortable and interesting.
Charleys Birthday was a highlight. Such a fun nice group of people. It was at his boyfriends place and it was smashing. Food for days everyone helping out the conversations and wine flowed and flowed.
Pool parties. I had a perfect non attendance at a friends pool party but made this final one and it was again fun. Ran into some of the nicest guys and that is always good. I am a bad "keep in touch" person. I just get into my hermit phase sometimes. Its annoying because I really should be following up on a lot of people.
Monday, September 17, 2007 1:03 AM
just got back from a short night out and I was told a few times that I am not seen that much these days.
cue:
“Nonexposure,” she added, “is better than appearing in the wrong thing.” (yeah a repeat worth repeating)
I truth be told am looking for good times with someone I love but in the interim less IS more.
Sunday, September 16, 2007 9:
51
PM
A little San Diego and Seaworld. A friend of mines relative is in charge off "all the mammals" at Seaworld. Nicest guy so he took us on a behind the scenes and we were able to interact with two amazing dolphins and see all sorts of cool stuff away from the THOUSANDS of kids. Of course one needs a good bottle of red for a tire change.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007 4:17 AM
fatigue. I think I realized that for as much as I love working and love transport last night pointed some things out for me. I got called in at midnight to transport a 26 week premature infant (that's pretty much as young as you get 25 weekers and 24 weekers are the limit really) who was born in a car and now had complications. After a while of seeing all the news stories of the miracle babies etc etc you realize that they are really the exceptions when you are talking this young. We showed up all laughing and having a good catch up time with each other (one of my favorite nurses was on) and I knew a bunch of people at the other hospital so it was little catch up. We did our transfer efficiently but really to my mind mechanically. I talked to the 16 year old mother and her parents tried to answer all the questions and we were back in the ambulance at 2am.
But really my heart was missing on this one. I really looked at this patient as yet another too young patient who will have a horrific course and IF they are lucky (very subjective use here) they might become a severely delayed child bouncing from chronic care facility or home to the ER to the inpatient ward again and again. I know everyone has a story of this kid or that but trust me we see a hundred kids to that one.
I wrote this essay a long time ago and I am glad I did. I think its a mental and emotional reboot.
Monday, September 10, 2007 11:20 PM
Burning Man had a
little more flash/bang this year. We were all sitting there expecting a little
flame and then wham this happened. We were all so shocked my finger happened
to be on the shutter and the fireworks/mushroom cloud combo is amazing.
from the NYT's obit of Jane Wyman
“Nonexposure,” she added, “is better than appearing in the wrong thing.”
too bad I did not know that before burning man. (pics here).
Burning man short movie clips.
What to say..how to say it..the man is such an experience to so may in so many different ways. there is no one way to do the man,every year its different as every year we show up and leave as different people. The core stays the same but every year there are lessons to be learned.
For me the Man is about taking the social contract to the next level. We just don't hold open the door for someone with that tight forced smile. ... we hold the door open give a hug some trinket sit and talk and enjoy the moment and dance til dawn.
Its about taking responsibility for yourself, the playa and the experiences of others. You enhance others experiences and for me that enhances mine. As it gets larger I think its so crucial to keep that ethos alive. There will always be those who want to go and be entertained or go for the party but its the moments of quiet playa time and talking with complete strangers that gets to me.
I met some great people and a couple of sparkling individuals that I hope to get to know better this year always a plus.
I will. be at burning man. Sorry for the dearth of updates. I have Vegas epics to post, laguna photos, the series I call dance floor make out.....classy all over.
its been a fun fun fun summer. i have to say. I have really gotten into a good groove with some new good friends where our times do not revolve around going out solely, cruising boys solely, traveling all over soley...but we seem to do a lot of that anyway..
fav random occurrence ..two stepping with a dripping hot sexy built like a tank man at a lesbian bar in fullerton on a sunday afternoon. never ceases to amaze me where we end up.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007 3:37 AM
These letters are why I love my friends. had an AMAZING Vegas weekend of no gambling but fun dinners Kathy Griffith show and having a grand ol time with great friends. pics to follow.
From: Office of Tricks and Affairs
To: Tim/Tom/Terry
RE: Unauthorized name modification
Dear Trick/Affair: It has come to our attention that on August 5, 2007 there
was an unauthorized name modification in a text message sent approximately 4pm
PST. While we at T&A's encourage spontaneity and creativity in all out clients
we have to stress that the rules are in place for a reason and really for your
protection. Early in the departments history (when we were under the aegis of
The Department of Pump and Dump. Dark days indeed.) it became quite clear that
in order to maintain order, a well designed, workable and sigma six system would
have to be implemented. We could have gone the way of UPS, FEDEX and other similar
multinational organizations with barcodes, labels, hand held scanners etc but
we chose instead to maintain a bit of our original whimsy. Your carefully chosen
given trick/affair name marks you as unique. It brings with it certain rights/privileges/obligations
and as such can not be tampered with in any way. You may inadvertently be changing
your name to one already assigned and in essence committing Trick/Affair Identity
theft (a felony). While we at the department understand the need you may feel
to have a say in your trick/affair name once given it is inviolate. As per the
bylaws you may appeal however that can only be done in person and can be at
times a demanding process.
Sincerely Yours,
The Department
To Whom It May Concern:
Recently our client, Mr. XXX (aka T3), received a letter from a representative
of the Department of Tricks & Affairs regarding a ‘name change.’
First off, there was no contact information, no direction for rebuttal, and
was not certified. My client will not be bullied, badgered, or barraged with
these type of communications; they are unprofessional, unethical, and unwarranted.
Please consider this correspondence a legal document in solicit of appeal to
the aforementioned name change:
Defense 1: Text messages are limited to 160 characters and it has become data
limiting to express all necessary information in one cost effective text while
still typing out full name of ‘TimTomTerry.’ We are arguing that
T3, while abbreviated, still resonates the full intention of the anonymous,
immaterial, and clandestine nature of the relationship.
Defense 2: My client has previously been called ‘Company’ (as in
I am having ‘Company’ tonight). This name was eventually modified
to become T.Co. or Tom Company. Once again it did not impact the meaning, content
or implication.
Defense 3: The name ‘TimTomTerry’ was wrongfully assigned by the
best friend, XXX. The by-laws clearly state that the Trick-ee, Mr. XXXX, must
be donned the name by the Trick-er, XXX, in order to be legally binding.
Thank you in advance for your acceptance and acknowledgement of this appeal.
From here on out, Mr. XXX will be known as ‘T3’ or ‘T-cubed.’
We are requesting that no other Tricks are allowed to be called T3 or T-cubed;
TimTomTerry is still applicable.
Regards,
Legal Counsel for
Mr. XXX(aka T3)
Tuesday, July 31, 2007 0:01 AM
All time best text message:
"Hey I'm shipping booze to the Vegas hotel tomorrow is there a certain kind of 267 you prefer?"
I am in love.
Monday, July 30, 2007 1:30 PM
the FIRST You tube I have watched start to finish.
Monday, July 30, 2007 12:44 PM
A little Pool Boy Action put on by a good friend LK Avelar.
ok I need to stop stop stop and think a bit.
I transported a 14 year old who had a bad bad thing. It was that rare occasion where someone is awake alert and KNOWS they are in a very bad spot and may not make it. Its one thing to take care of a critically care child who is intubated sedated but this is a rough situation.
Its the looks the nurses give each other across the bed, the "hurriedness" of things we do. The conversations that occur between specialist "away from the bedside" that gives the patient all the information he needs to know.
I flew from UCLA to Long Beach in about 10 minutes landed spent 15 minutes transferring him to my gurney,10 minutes back and a five minute run/walk to the ICU. All the while he was breathing fast, sweating, grabbing his face mask but giving a thumbs up in the heli. After I dropped him off I heard he "coded" that night and all the next day.
Its the fifth death I have had in a few weeks. Another teenager a two month old baby etc etc.
I was in the ER when at 2 am a father brought an infant in a car seat that was basically at the end of their rope. We literally grabbed the baby ran into a room and for the next hour I worked and worked on the baby to no avail. its the worst situation where its you and only you working with nurses and rt's and trying and trying but nothing works. I can't speak for every doctor but I think with my friends and myself we never forget these kids. ever. they don't haunt us etc but there is always the replay in my head. what went right what else could have been done and so on.
and to top it off I missed a good chance to shut up and over spoke. All I said was true and in the record as it were but while discretion may be the better part of valor it was not the better part of Vince. SO ANOTHER chance for self recrimination and inspection. yea.
BUT we go on and learn and have some fun times with good people. I am having some good opportunities to meet whole new swathes of people in Los Angeles so that is great. and I have new shoes. suck on that Donald.
and peace out to you sweet and talented Tom . Good seeing you Sat. Hope the 11 pm pool party was fun and you are welcome baby.
Saturday, July 28, 2007 10:32 PM
I have been BZZZZY so sorry no hot boys yet WAIT. they r a coming.
Monday, July 16, 2007 7:17 AM
What a weekend. Flew to pick up a sick sick kid jumped from that to the Outfest opening party....fun fun.... jumped from that to a great hike in the mountains to a great brunch catch up to a little ol pool party for EQCA to a bday party until 2am to work from 8-4 to the Hollwood bowl to see Groove Armada. Now the week begins....good I need a rest.
Saturday, July 14, 2007 3:35 AM
no matter who it comes from or where....
when closure happens let it.
Its a great feeling.
Friday, July 13, 2007 6:12 PM
In one day
Wednesday, July 11, 2007 1:50 PM
Amy Winehouse.
I
Am
Her
Bitch.
and when you roll your eyes, cuz you will, cuz they are going to play Rehab to freaking death.....but I already have many memories dancing with my head thrown back smiling a mile wide with friends singing along. Its really a great album capturing the many moods we all go through.
AND listen to the words.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007 12:19 PM
Brilliant. Esp the Camera work. Now if I only HAD a dishwasher.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007 2:21 PM
some of the boys at the River. As busy I as try to be with people places things I am surfing the waves of memory (partially from walking paths already trod literally (that was just to throw you english majors into a tiz)) these days trying not to sink. I guess it proves the point....you have to deal with the feelings since they are never going to go away otherwise.....damn.
Spent the morning making kids high for MRI scans. Sort of cool sort of fun. A little extra cash.
Now off for the ER for a night of fun. of course that's when a friend calls and has an extra ticket for a screening of Hairspray. I am a little sick of working nights and weekends a lot. It really is starting to suck. While I have freedom to do a lot I feel and have always felt so out of synch at times.
of course that out of synch feeling is something I have felt before. Its comfy, like an iron maiden.
Monday, July 9, 2007 3:17 PM
A great quote from a good friend bekka: <Block Island Accent> " Everything and everyone are interrelated so you are better off shutting up and not telling anyone, anything unless they need to know."
Monday, July 9, 2007 2:43 PM
YIN
YANG
Spent a week in the russian river where I
1) Met some MORE amazing people from all over but esp. SF and parts north. Seattle trip upcoming.
2) Did a 50 mile bike ride with a 1200 foot climb with 4-12% grade. Maybe I should have read the map a little closer. Lets say that my ass was kicked but I did make the whole ride without walking up any 12% grades once. It does not sound like much until you are pedaling up it.
3) Made great dinners had great kayaking
Came back in time for my friend LK's pool party at the Standard hotel. He put it together to benefit the Gay and Lesbian Young Professionals Council and it was fun but a little bit of a culture shock. My friend LK did a great job had a great DJ and has three more parties in line.